we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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