you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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