Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
