hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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