Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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