In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
He passed out mid-signature
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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