The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Randomize
