She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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