he wants to bone in the snuggie
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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