Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
