Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
