i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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