apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
