Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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