yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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