i think i have herpe
just one?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Let's paint friendship bongs
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
