I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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