I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
