I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
you win again, gameday.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
