I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize