Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Randomize
