I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
i think i have herpe
just one?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
