I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
cat food counts as protein by the way
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
