there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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