it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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