now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
