I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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