omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
