I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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