Did you just see the Batmobile???
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
