I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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