I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
