we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize