Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
he thought i was a dude.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
