hell yes lets make some ravioli
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
