What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
accomplished twins. life is a go
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I am never drinking with the goths again.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
