You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize