Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
