But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Randomize
