...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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