so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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