she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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