I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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