you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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