meet me or not, i'm out of control
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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