She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
