How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
you win again, gameday.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
