I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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