Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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