we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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