I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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